Every behavior we engage in is taking us either toward what is important to us or away from internal or external experiences we don’t want. Noticing that we move in one of two directions is crucial if we intend to influence learning in others. Between these poles of toward and away lie an infinite number of actions. Our selections are ultimately influenced by the context we are in and what we are trying to accomplish. Traditional educators are usually working from the context of a classroom or learning center. Alternative approaches may be in the context of more natural settings, vocational training, homeschooling, etc. Each context or learning community has a mission it aspires to with some generally agreed upon actions it seeks to promote. The extent to which learners and educators can agree on what actions to take largely determines how things turn out.

Using the Matrix is a great way to get some perspective on the direction we are going in. Whenever learners or educators sort their experiences into the Matrix there is an immediate awareness of the direction one is traveling in. This can lead to either acknowledgement and reinforcement  that what we are doing is working or that a course correction is needed. To influence learners the majority of our behaviors need to take place with learners present. It is very difficult to influence someone who is not there. We may engage in planning, developing, meeting etc. and while these are worthwhile they do not directly influence learners toward curiosity and engagement. The best kind of influence takes place when we are directly collaborating with them. When influencing others we can notice our behaviors and where they are taking us. They can notice their actions as well. When learners and educators are “in sync” there is a consensus about which actions are working and which aren’t. Obstacles may show up and there is a sense of “we can work through this together” amongst the collaborators. Of course, building consensus takes time. Our minds want a “quick fix” but our experience tells us that change happens one behavior at a time. When things get “out of sync” we may notice our minds churning with thoughts of “this won’t work”, “I can’t”, “I have to (fill in the blank)”. These thoughts are usually accompanied by unpleasant feelings and sensations.

The next step in the Matrix process is noticing what we do next and where that action is taking us. Is my behavior taking me toward more choice or less choice? What is the story in my head? Does it feel sticky and uncomfortable or does it leave me with options? Is it helping to increase learner collaboration in our shared activity or do I see them moving away from engagement? Can I hold it lightly and keep going?” It is in the process of coming back again and again to noticing that flexibility shows up. Can we continue to build consensus and collaboration while taking the unwanted stuff inside us along for the ride? Where are we going now?