In one of our middle school classes we have established what I call the Daily Matrix Ritual. Teachers, students and support staff meet each morning and begin the day by drawing the Matrix, followed by asking and answering the “four questions”. Each person takes turns noticing who and what is important, identifying what is showing up on the inside (usually a mix of tired, pleased, anxious, satisfied and bored ) as well as toward/away moves we make as we begin our day. We list what we plan to do and also what actual or potential obstacles may show up and get in our way (since the day has just started the obstacles are usually the unwanted thoughts/feelings that we may be experiencing on the inside). It is also a time to celebrate successes and support continuing to work toward each member’s goals.

Everyone, staff and students alike, looks forward to what we call our “check in”. We have created what is known as a ritual. Research and experience tells us that rituals involve activities that foster connection within a shared space. The Matrix ritual offers an empowering way to prevent and recover from problems while fostering sharing and creativity. What we are noticing is that this simple Matrix activity of asking respectful questions results in:

> Students connecting to what they value
> Students connecting to each other
> Students connecting to teachers ( and teaches to students )
> The group connecting to a shared purpose

It’s not about getting anywhere and yet everyone participates in the “respectful space” we create each day. We simply notice all of this and go on with our day, the class generally carrying the group cooperation with them as they move through academic tasks and activities. As we see each other throughout the day we may or may not refer back to the check in and get curious about how things are going. At the end of the day we have another quick Matrix meeting to notice how things have turned out.

If you have a group or class that meets regularly you may want to give the check in a try. You never know what’s going to show up!

In an effort to get the Matrix up and running in as many classrooms and schools as possible, I will be offering a series of live webinars. I will be presenting the Matrix and how it can be used to promote cooperation and collaboration. There will also be opportunities for questions and how to utilize the psychological flexibility point of view in various contexts.

The first event will be held November 18 at 6 PM. Check out my Facebook page to register.

I hope to see you there!

Image courtesy of MakersMischief 

Have you ever heard of Horse Whisperers?

Horse Whisperers are a respected lineage of horse trainers who, over the years, have promoted gentle and humane ways of working with young colts and troubled older ones to get them on the right track and develop cooperation with humans. Individuals like Tom Dorrance, Ray Hunt, and the contemporary Buck Brannahan have promoted the notion that humans need to get to know the horse by establishing what they call “willing communication” with soft words, well-timed nudges, pats and encouragement. Their teachings are honed from countless trial and error interactions where they notice what works and what doesn’t. It is a patient and persistent approach in the face of resistance and fear on the part of reluctant horses. They know when to lean in or take a firm hand. They call it “feel”. Occasionally they will need to “wave some red flags” but only long enough to get the horse’s attention so they can get back to the work of collaboration.

Tom, Ray and Buck are big proponents of “making the right thing easy to do”. They way they do this is to set the horse up for success, start where the horse is, be on the side of the horse, communicating through sounds and gestures that humans are accepting and non threatening. Experience tells horse whisperers that when they can establish these conditions the horse will come through and learn to be a willing partner.

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Here is a brief clip about using the Matrix to promote psychological flexibility with your learners.

The challenging aspect is to promote psychological flexibility in ourselves.